This is going to go a few places first, so just stick with me.

On my way to work this morning I was listening to an episode of Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard. His guest was Hillary Clinton. People, including me, have very strong and diverse opinions about Hillary. I have not historically been a Hillary fan, but I did really enjoy this episode. I learned a lot about her I didn’t know and it really changed my persepective.

Realizing there was a lot about her I didn’t know, when I got to work I pulled up her Wikipedia page for a quick read. After the not so quick read of her entire page, I texted one of my best friends.

“You know what my real problem with Hillary is? Bill.”

Say what you want about her as a politician. But Hillary Clinton is a real BAB. Total breaker of chains and glass ceilings. Highly accomplished, clearly brilliant, incredibly driven. From a young age people saw in her someone who was going to move mountains. 

I know you have that friend (maybe it’s more than one), that is smart and beautiful and wonderful. But is dating, or did date, some dick head dude. She brings so much to the table, but is willing to let herself be treated like garbage for whatever reason. You probably shook her and told her she deserved better, and then put a hex on the jerk. (No? Okay, guess that’s just me.)

I’m not married, and I have no right to judge the Cinton’s marriage based on a Wikipedia page, but WHY DID NO ONE SHAKE HILLARY? A highly successful lawyer and politician before she ever had a thought of being first lady. A woman, who like so many, was afraid of losing herself and her ambitions to her husband’s career. 

And now her wikipedia page is riddled with Bill Clinton’s affairs.

And then I started thinking about my own young life. I’m no saint, so let’s get that settled right now. I’m sure there’s some voodoo dolls out there with my name on them. 

But my god. When I look back on the last 10 years there is more than one instance when I would have liked to shake myself. Laying on the ground crying over what some boy did or didn’t think of me. Letting some jerk (there have been plenty) influence what I say, what I wear, who I hang out with. Tying my self worth to the value someone else saw in me.

But even beyond boys, why do we let the opinions of anyone not worth our time control our lives? 

I’m fortunate to have some truly lovely friends (the ones that have scrapped my crying body off the floor) whose opinions I value a lot. But I’ve also valued some other opinions in the past that weren’t worth my time. People I thought were my friends, people I knew were not. People I was trying to impress for no reason. 

I recently heard Des Linden say something about being comfortable in her own skin. Her advice for how to get there was that you’ll never be for everyone. But who you truly are is definitely going to be some people’s cup of tea, and those are the people that matter. 

Be confident in who you are and what you bring to the table.

I don’t know Hillary Clinton, so I have no right to judge her. But I sure hope someone shook her and told her how amazing she was on her own. She was a first lady, sure. But she was and is a whole lot of other things. I would argue a whole lot more than the President she’s married to.

Cheers,

Molly